Welcome to Magickal-Musings!

Greetings All ~

I thank you for stopping by. I hope you'll make yourself comfortable & stay a while. I have a great many things to share that I believe are interesting & I hope that you will find them interesting as well. Please friend me also on Facebook. I'm there under "Nefer Khepri" & I hope you will also visit my site, Magickal-Musings.com. I wish you all many blessings.

Monday, June 28, 2010

You Get What You Pay For

How many times have we heard that phrase?  Yet, in the vast majority of cases it's so true. 

I remember back when Stuart and I were first married.  Money was always tight. I was completing my dissertation and wasn't working.  Stuart was working as an accountant and wasn't making much since his former financial experience consisted of bank teller.  Each month we were barely making ends meet.  If I needed something I had to cut back in other areas so I could save up for it.

We'd buy generic store-brand food.  Not the same as the name brand stuff, I don't care what anyone says.  Even today, I can tell if it's generic. We'd use generic paper towels that were only a slight improvement over using kleenex for the same job. We hate spaghetti and hamburger twice a week (each!).  I'd wear my bras until they were literally falling apart and making my boobs look funny.  We even had to go without routine medical care, like dental cleanings for a brief time.  Thankfully, neither one of us ever had any problems.

We all work hard for our money. I don't care if you're in an office job, bank job, public servant of any kind, academic, babysitter, or even a stay-at-home-mom who has to budget carefully to be sure she can remain at home with her kids.  We all work hard for our money and we all have valuable skills for which we are compensated for when we get paid.

Now, let's think about this for a minute.  Let's say you're sick and you need to see a doctor, but like many Americans you don't have medical insurance and you're low on cash.  What to do?  Do you call your doctor and say, "Oh, you know, I'm sick, I really need an appointment, but I have no money right now.  Can I pay you later?"  Or - worse - "will the doctor see me for free?"

Your doctor sacrificed to go through years of medical school.  He or she may have gotten a scholarship for a good part of that, but they may be up to their butt in student loans and you have no idea.  The doctor is a highly skilled individual who's knowledge and gifts are worth something.  It's just common sense that a person would never ask for a free medical consultation.

I got my hair colored a few weeks ago.  Here is my new "do". Did I ask Kevin, my stylist, if he could do it for free even though Stuart had just lost his job two days before my scheduled appointment?  NO!  I would never dream of it! Kevin is an artist in every sense of the word.  He created this color for me.  I simply told him I wanted to go lighter, but not too light, with a few highlights.  This is what he came up with.  A masterpiece, in my opinion, and well worth the $85 he charged me.  He stands on his feet most of the day, he even eats his lunch most times standing up. I've seen him do it.  Don't you think this is worth $85?  I sure do.

So, why do people insist on asking for free spiritual consultations???  Now, I'm not saying I'm on an even footing with a doctor. However, in my case, I can't say for all - of course, I have over 25 years of experience behind me.  Not to mention numerous classes, seminars, I've read countless books, and have worked hard to master what I know and the types of services I offer through my site.  I've done this at all a great personal and professional cost to myself.  I have a PhD.  Not many know that as I don't flaunt it.  I just use the letters after my name or I sometimes refer to myself as "Dr. Nefer Khepri", but that's very rare and I'm sure many of you have never even seen that.  I studied anthropology, archaeology, and the spiritual belief systems of indigenous peoples for 12 years at 3 universities as I worked hard to get my bachelor's, masters, and my doctorate.  My education left me with a student loan of over $18,000. 

Yet, despite being set up for a lucrative career in academia, I turned my back on all of it when I heard the call of my guides and the universe wishing for me to be on a spiritual path.  My husband nearly left me over this.  Yes, I nearly lost him.  It caused a tremendous amount of friction in our marriage for a few years.  This issue did not go away overnight.  It was years before I began to make any money.  

At first, I only wanted to do as I was asked and help people.  That's it. I wanted to help people find guidance through the tarot.  Help them to heal through reiki.  Help them connect with their own spirit guides through classes I offered at my home.  Help them to manifest their dreams through candle work, or enchantments, as I call them.  All I wanted to do was help.  When someone told me they didn't have the money I'd do it anyway.  They either paid me later on or they never did.  I can tell you that those who never paid me would later ask me, "why didn't it work?"  Well, I did it with the right intention, with their highest good in the center of my mind and heart, but energy is energy.  An even exchange must occur for the energy to be balanced and for it to be able to do its work.  My own reiki master teacher explained the concept to me when she found out I had done 5 free reiki attunements in a single day and was flabbergasted.  

Another thing.  The more you say "yes" to people who ask for free services, the more likely they are to come back, asking for MORE free services.  They always have a hard luck story to tell me.  Never fails.  It's VERY rare that I've had a person come to me weeks or even months after I did something for them for free and they pay me.  However, it did happen.  Things like that kept my faith in humanity intact.  Other times they'd come by my house with a plate of food.  Again, energy being exchanged for energy, and those meals were always yummy as people would bring me their specialities :D

Eventually, in order to save my sanity I had to start saying "no" to people, as much as that hurt me. I am one of those people who simply has a hard time saying no.  I do not like the word "no."  I don't like using it with others and I certainly don't like it when they use it with me. Yet, there I was doing 3 - 4 free readings a day, giving free reiki attunements, doing few free soul portraits (and those can take weeks to complete as every single color must be correct and I get all that info through repeated meditation sessions).  So I had to start saying NO, and wow, no one liked it, but then who could blame them?

People got angry with me.  People belittled me.  They told me I wasn't spiritual.  They said I was a fake (even though they had reaped benefits from the work I had done for them in the past at no charge!).  They said I was a horrible person.  I went from always having people at our house to having no one for months as I worked hard to build up a client base of paying clients.  I finally succeeded, then we had to move to a new city and I lost my local clients except for a very few. I had to start all over, but I had no local base from which to draw clients, so for the past 10 years I've been available strictly over the internet.

Yet, every once in a while someone will send me an email of their story, explaining why they can't pay me, yet they know my services are valuable.  Their story may be true, then again, it may not.  I have no way of knowing.  I respond the same every time.  I nicely explain I had to pay for all of my classes, seminars, workshops, and books. I underwent a 3-month unpaid apprenticeship to my reiki master teacher in order to fully master giving reiki sessions and passing attunements on to others. Often, I had to postpone my spiritual studies because I didn't have money to take a class or attend a workshop.  I explained that my time, knowledge, and energy were valuable to me and therefore I had the right to charge for my services (something for which every once in a while I receive criticism). 

Now, in all cases, until today, the person is NICE. Remember, they're trying to get something for free, something they know is of value so they are as nice as possible hoping I'll say yes.  After being taken advantage of so many times, though I never say yes anymore, as much as that pains me.  Then today I receive an email on Facebook from a young man who obviously found my FB through the links on my site.  He starts off by asking if I'll give him a free reiki attunement and says he doesn't have the money to pay, but yet he knows my services are valuable.  Same 'ol, same 'ol.  However, in the next sentence his tone changes as if he's got multiple personality disorder.  He tells me that if I don't answer his email that will prove I'm just a fake and full of BS.

Well, I did reply because I thought he at least DESERVED a reply.  He did take the time to write, after all, even though he was out to get a very valuable thing for absolutely nothing, for no exchange of energy at all. I would understand if he was a reader, for example, and offered me a reading in exchange.  But he came with hands held out and his hands were empty.  I simply told him what I tell everyone else, exactly what I wrote 2 paragraphs ago.  

He wrote back full of venom claiming I'm a fake, that I "prey on gullable, innocent people."  Why was he being so ugly, I asked myself?  Why was he insulting my clientele by claiming they were gullable?  Had I written something to offend him?  I looked back at my response to his first email.  Nothing there was offensive in the slightest.  I had concluded that email by telling him that if he didn't have the money for a reiki attunement now then it was not the time and the Universe would work to get him the money when the time was right. I have found this to be true in my own life countless times.  I told him that, too. Yet, there he was claiming I'm this horrible person out to steal everyone's money from them.  Then he said if I didn't respond I was truly full of BS, yet he concluded by thanking me for the information I provide on my site!

Well, if I'm full of BS, then why is he thanking me for information I provide? Isn't that also full of BS by association with me???  I wrote back and simply asked, "why do you feel so intent on spreading hate?  I feel that before you can be attuned to reiki you need to pray and focus on clearing yourself of the hate you so obviously feel.  I'm praying for you and wish you nothing but the best. When the time is right you will be attuned to reiki.  I know that."  

Then I did something that is still troubling me.  I blocked him from my Facebook. He can no longer email me and he can't access me in any way through Facebook unless he creates a new profile. He can, however, email me through AOL if he took the time to see the numerous email links I have spread all through my web site.  If he does, I'll block him on AOL, too if he continues to be hateful.  

If you're a spiritual practitioner, just because the majority of people may not believe in what you do, YOU know it to be REAL.  You know you have a gift, you have talents, and you're opened your mind and heart to share them with the world. 

Every spiritual practitioner has sacrificed to get to where they are today.  Some, like me, have given up a guaranteed $50,000/yr income to make peanuts doing what I do.  Most months I don't even make enough to cover a single house payment.  I have for the past 2 months, praise the Gods and thank my clients since Stuart's been out of work, but this is an anomaly, but perhaps the start of a new trend (let's hope!).  I don't begrudge anyone that regular income.  In fact, I consider myself MUCH MORE blessed to be in this line of work than to be an academic who is always under the gun to "publish or perish" and always having to brown nose to get ahead (I have never been good at kissing ass, nor is that something I aspire to).  My old friends from grad school - the majority of them are divorced due to all the stress, some are on medication and some have health problems.  I'm thankful that I'm not among them.  Sure, I have up a lot to be here, but look at all I have.  I set my own hours. I can work in my pajamas if I want (and have done so - many times!).  I stay at home and raise my daughter.  I don't have to put up with a boss or any crazy co-workers. I have it MADE.  I am so blessed and so very thankful.

This guy obviously really upset me.  His emails brought back a lot of unpleasant memories from the past that I thought were gone.  I guess this is a good lesson for me.  It showed me that although I had convinced myself I had released all those memories, I clearly have not or they would not have raised to the surface so easily and so immediately.  This young man taught me something important.  He taught me that after all these years I am still in some way holding on to some old resentments against those people who took such extreme advantage of me in the past. I haven't even seen or spoken with any of these people in YEARS, yet the feelings are still there when I think of them.

I am taking my own advice here. I suggested to him that he work on cleansing himself of his hate.  Meanwhile, I am starting to work on releasing my old resentments so I can finally allow the past to be the past so it will stop influencing my present and future.

This is an excellent example of how a great lesson can come to us through adversity.  Back when I used to channel St. Michael (who since 2002 has been too busy, it seems, but he'll be back again one day, as he promised me), in his words:

"Humanity's greatest Teacher is Adversity.  Through Adversity the most difficult of lessons are mastered."  

Amen, Michael :)

Many Blessings to You All,

Nefer Khepri

Thursday, June 24, 2010

FREE Enchantment Offer - LIMITED TIME!

Well, let's see how many people actually read my blog, shall we?  I'm offering a FREE single-votive enchantment to three lucky people.

Your enchantment can be for any purpose.  This is a single candle votive, and will include 3 herbs and 3 corresponding essential oils that are helpful to your intentions.  You will receive an Enchantment Report that will consist of a brief summary of how your candle performed and a psychic interpretation of your candle's remains.

This is open to everyone who reads this blog.  Simply leave a comment here.  I will write everyone's name donw on slips of paper and have a drawing on Tuesday, July 6th.  Winners will be chosen at random from all who have posted a comment here.  You don't have to leave a long comment.  Just a simple, "Hey, cool, hope I win!"  will suffice. 

I will post the names of winners here on Tuesday, July 5th after 5 PM CST. 

Contest ends Tuesday, July 5th at 5 PM CST.

I am also posting a link to this blog on my Facebook page so all my Facebook friends will also be aware of the contest.

Good luck to everyone!  I shall look forward to performing your candle work for you!


Nefer Khepri

Monday, June 21, 2010

What I Plan to Do During My Summer

Normally, when someone speaks of their summer images of surf, sand, fun in the sun, picnics, and just general fun outdoors comes to one's mind.  Well, it comes to my mind, anyhow.  

The thing is, I will most likely be doing very few of those fun things this summer.  My husband lost his job the week before Easter and was unemployed for 9 1/2 weeks.  Thankfully, he's now back at work.  However, he can't take a vacation until September.  By then our 11-year-old daughter will be back in school, which will then preclude us from being able to leave town.  Last summer we went to Maui.  Then last November we went to New Orleans.  Both were awesome trips, each very unique, and for me, both were quite spiritually fulfilling.

I have discovered that with this summer that will be spent completely at home I had fallen into a trap.  Perhaps this trap was invented by the travel industry. Maybe it's somehow engrained into us by society. I've no idea.  The trap I'm speaking of is "home-isn't-any-fun-so-we-must-leave-town-in-order-to-find-fun-things-to-do."  

How many of you have fallen into the same trap?  I took this picture as we sat down for our first dinner in Maui last summer.  It's idyllic, isn't it?  There was the sound of the surf not 50 feet from our table.  You could smell the plumeria blooming in the trees all around us.  The ocean breezes caressed our faces.    Fond memories, one and all.  

This summer what are we doing?  I'll tell you.  Every summer I work with our daughter. I prepare her for the coming school year.  This is why she excels year after year to the point that moving into middle school next year her teachers instructed us to enroll her in all Pre-AP (Advanced Placement) courses.  Since she was averaging 4 to 5 A's per report card, we agreed with their assessment.

As with every summer, the first weekend school let out Ariel and I headed to the bookstore to get her work books.  I started working with her last week, giving her a couple of weeks to have nothing but fun to start her summer.  I am now very shocked and downright furious with the three teachers she had for the fifth grade.  I am discovering her vocabulary is lacking.  Her math skills are not up to snuff, and her reading comprehension isn't where it should be.  Those workbooks are arranged so the first few lessons are meant as review.  The child should always know all this material and be able to breeze on through it.  However, Ariel is having problems.  LOTS of them.

Now I know my summer will be spent cracking the whip over the poor child, who through no fault of her own, is having all sorts of issues with division, fractions ("Mom, we did those, but I don't remember any of it"), not knowing that "create" and "destruction" are antonyms, and so on and so forth.  I am so dismayed with her teachers, who never once communicated with me she was having any trouble whatsoever.  In fact, they stressed how well she was doing.  Well, I guess if you're teaching a fifth grader on a 3rd or 4th grade level and the child is intelligent, they are bound to do well.  I had no idea that's what had been happening.  The fifth grade teachers for this year had decided to abolish homework.  YES!  The time-honored tradition of giving a kid work to do at home so they could practice the concepts they were learning in school - ABOLISHED FOR THE YEAR!!  She got a few assignments here and there, but nothing like she did every single year previous - even in kindergarten she had homework every single day.  I discussed this with her teachers who assured me Ariel was doing fine and would do very well moving on to middle school, so well, in fact, that they insisted she be placed in all Pre-AP courses.

Now Mom is freaking thinking, "there's no way on earth this child will be able to remain in Pre-AP, she'll get moved back and this will traumatize her for life."  I was in Advanced Placement in 8th grade and my best friend got moved back.  She NEVER got over it, and although after we moved on to high school very few people knew about it, she carries that stigma with her to this day.  I do NOT want that for MY child.  

So now Mom's cracking the whip, and suddenly Mom had become the BAD GUY.  Oh, Mom is MEAN because Mom wants her kid to do Math.  Mom is horrible because I force my kid to do these reading assignments and answer questions about what she's read.  Wow, and we haven't even gotten to the grammar section of her workbooks yet!  So just she wait.  She's in for a real treat when it comes to grammar, not one of my specialties, either.  Then again, neither is math.  Thank goodness for those answer keys that come tucked in the back of each work book.

So there I was on Friday, the day before my 47th birthday, feeling sorry for myself.  I was going to be stuck home all summer long with a surly child who did not want to do her workbook assignments and who was repeatedly insisting I was mean as I repeatedly patiently explained to her how her teachers had let her down, how she had to get up to speed if she expected to do well in 6th grade, and how important a good education is to everyone in our family and that one day she will be going to college if we have anything to say about it, and believe me, we have PLENTY to say!  

I was sitting in our breakfast nook that overlooks the backyard.  Back in April, 2008 as my mother was in a long-term care facility recuperating from a severe blood infection that nearly killed her, we had a deck built.  It's a very nice, large deck with room for a dining room-size patio table with a ceramic tile surface and six comfy patio chairs.  Our propane grill is also on the deck.  There's also a lot more room available.  I was sitting there thinking that with all that had gone on with my mom, who ended up getting a second blood infection and died January 20, 2008, that we hadn't had any time to really use that deck.  After she died, my dad moved in with us as it was sadly apparent he had no idea how to take care of himself.  He put himself in the hospital with gastric interitis a week after Mom had passed.  That was it.  We moved him in and I was looking forward to spending time with him.  That's when it became apparent something was very wrong with him.  He developed dementia and was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease.  He passed away September 20, 2009.  

The day Dad passed away I was also looking out at our deck thinking, "wow, what a great deck, but we've never really used it with all the time I spend in the hospitals and nursing homes.  Wish I had time to use my deck."  Ten minutes later I got the dreaded call.  Dad had just died.  As I hung up the phone in tears I heard his voice.  He said quite simply, "it's okay now.  Go ahead and use your patio."  To Dad, it was a patio.  We call  it a deck.  So I knew for sure it was him and not my mind playing tricks on me.

Time has passed.  My husband and I were planning a trip to England for this summer, my spiritual home. I've had 3 past lives there of which I can recall some vivid details to the point I found one of my former houses, still intact and now a lovely B&B in the Somerset countryside.  I was excited beyond belief I was going to get to go back, having last been to London in 1991.  Prior to that I was in England in 1989 for a 2-week tour of England, Cornwall and Wales that had the theme of "The Real and the Legendary King Arthur."  We saw all the places mentioned in the stories. I felt I'd died and gone to heaven. Perhaps more on that in another blog.  I had some interesting experiences there - one involving a crop circle, the other my own personal ghost in my hotel room.  

Happily planning our trip and about to start making reservations, Stuart came home with tears in his eyes to tell me he'd just lost his job.  I remember all the pamphelts of the London tube system, day trips to Stonehenge and Bath, a trip up to the Cotswolds, all slid off my lap and landed willy-nilly on the cold tile floor.  I looked down at all those lovely photos of places I had either never seen or dearly loved to see again.  I cried more over that trip than my husband losing his job.  For me, the day that trip ended was the day my dream of returning to my spiritual home died.  At least for the time being.  There's always next summer.

So, no trips, no weekend getaways as my husband doesn't like to travel for just a couple of days unless it's to see his parents in Austin (something I loath doing as they're fairly negative people who are quite judgmental of what I do and what I believe).

Friday, as I sat there looking out at our deck I told the Universe, "I'm going to have a nice vacation this summer and it will be right out there on our deck.  So, let's make it happen!"  Then I let it go as Ariel needed me, the dinner needed to get cooked, the dog needed to be played with - duty constantly calls when you're a mother, even if you're only a mother of one, as I am.

Saturday was my birthday and Stuart took me for lunch at McDonald's, then it was shopping for me.  He gave me a Sony Bloggie, a pair of Sketcher's Shape Ups (which really do seem to work, I'm so shocked and pleased!), and then dinner out, the evening ending with a wonderful full body massage courtesy of my husband.  All in all a great day.  I was too busy to spend any time out on the deck.

Sunday was Father's Day and we shopped again, this time for Stuart who wanted an iPhone, but changed his mind and didn't want the new one. He wanted the same model I have, so we found it for $99 at WalMart.  We had to go to 2 WalMarts to find one and once we did he got the last one they had.  While we were there he wandered off and came back with a cart loaded with two chez lounge chairs for our deck.  I immediately thought back to what I had told the Universe.  Stuart hates to spend money, being a banker and also having security issues, so for him to splurge on additional patio furniture when we don't use the patio was pretty much downright insane of him.  As he came up to me he said, "I figure we have this great patio we haven't had much of a chance to use due to all the bad stuff going on with our family these past few years, so I figured I'd get these chairs and we can spend more time out there." 

I smiled.   Yes, the Universe DOES work in MYSTERIOUS ways :)

So this summer I'll be out on my patio enjoying the view of my rose garden, half of which died off in the winter hard freezes we had this past winter, but they're coming back slow, but sure.  

As I gazed out into my yard early this morning I realized that a real vacation isn't a place.  It's a state of mind.  Relax. Enjoy the moment.  That's how you really get away.  You can go to the most exciting or romantic location you can dream up, but if you're weighed down with the concerns of your life how is that a vacation?  

While I stretched out in my new lounge chair sipping an amaretto ice coffee I had just brewed, I sighed.  The humidity, ever present around here, was causing my hair to clump in an unruly manner.  My bra was collection perspiration.  I wasn't extremely comfortable, but as I drew in a deep breath and caught the faint whisper of the scent of roses from my rose bushes, I smiled.  This is my summer vacation and I can take it any time I want, as many times as I like throughout the day and well into the evening.  There's no airplane to catch. No uncomfortable hotel bed.  It's just me, my deck, my roses, and the Universe. 

This is what I plan to do with my summer.  What about you?